Human body, a miraculous system which is held together by nearly countless particles as well as something which is in functional state because of all those particles working together so perfectly........ Or for that matter any living for in existence...... A few posts ago I so very naively said that I was disappointed with the way things were in this world.... And it seems that I was not thinking clearly cause I was under the illusion of knowledge something which I very much doubt I have enough of to be boasting such statements........ Although I said all that it did not stop the process, the process which sometimes enables sometimes helps and sometimes forces me to question everything.......... And because of that I'd like to believe that I will think twice in the future before making such thoughtless and ignorant statements......... First of all this place does not exist to amuse me as a being nor does it exists to fulfill anyone's expectations, this place is just...... And it is us who seek meaning,need,reason,logic and such in this place....... All the things which a complex mind may create for it to give some satisfaction to its own ego or pride or may be simply the drive to put this chaos in some order however bizarre it may seem to someone else....... The process as mentioned earlier just never stops and it is indeed the very reason for all these questions....... And when one thinks about it, one can laugh at their own existence, true that I still have fear of not existing in this world but I believe it is a part of our evolutionary threat assessment system....... But it's just not that easy.......... When one thinks about anything there are two sides to it, on one side all the process of asking questions and understanding the information one has and putting it into some order by which one will be able to make sense of it exists..... While on the other side there must be something, something which I don't entirely know about..... But I have a reason to believe that there must be something which verifies the order that we have come up with and approves or disapproves it for the time being....... As by experience I can say that nothing is ever concrete when it comes to thoughts or for that matter just about anything in this place...... But if that is the case then what is it which verifies the path that you have chosen to go on? What makes this other process superior than our own reasoning? And if there exists such a thing then how is it that we do not have the first preference to use that over the logical reasoning's of our physical brain? Is this the ever so scandalous soul? And if that is so then how is it that millions of years of evolution has not taught us to tap into that resource? What makes it unreachable? Of course I say that cause humans have an uncanny knack to tap into any and all resources they can get their hands on...... And since that is the case how is it that this particular part of essentially every human being remains unscathed? And of course when I say why don't we tap into it I mean why is it that we are not able to use it as easily and as freely as we use our own brain? Our brain is continually working on everything, Our brain is the primary reason we are able to function ever so smoothly...... And yet we are not able to use the other resource which may prove to be a notch more helpful than our logical and reasoning brain........
Even with all this reasoning and this logical brain I failed to notice that I was an imbecile, an ignorant being in a reverie of having enough knowledge to criticize and judge this place cause it was not according to his expectations........ The sheer stupidity of the very thought of it makes me want to laugh at myself for even having such a thought let alone posting it........
Although there is one thing that I have not changed my opinion about, this place still does not interest me, I admit that I have the desire to discover more about this place but I certainly can just live and die ignorant if the process which drives me currently, stops for some reason......... It seems to me now that no amount of time can truly accomplish which I had initially set out for....... And since I am an inferior being with no control over the things that happen around me I will be doing something which I was unconsciously doing for all these years...... Now that I think about it, it somehow makes sense to me....... My life until now has been simply a third person's view of different chain of events linked together by various persons,places and means.......... And since I do not seem to be an active part of it, or at the very least that's how it seems to me...... it all appears like a reverie............ Just like when one dreams........ You can never remember the beginning of your dream nor do you remember or understand when your dream ends......... Just like so seem all those events to me......... Nothing more than a reverie.......... Which is why I am compelled to write this blog, so that I can recollect what may have slipped through my mind........ Which in turn I hope explains as to why am I not attracted towards the things which normal people seem to be attracted towards..........
As I side note to myself I'd like to say, if in future again you think you are getting bored of this place, simply start thinking about the first thing that pops in your head and do not give up until you have all the answers to all of your questions from the inception of the initial question, that should rid the boredom.
